The Business men are drinking my blood.

"Show her some beauty before all this damage is done."

There's something strange in the air tonight, and it's not just the added electrical currents the looming thunderstorm is sending out.

Tonight, (being the first sober night I've had in weeks) I started talking with an old friend about life.
It seems we're both in the midst of a pessimistic quarter life crisis. Who am I? What do I want out of life? Why is it that I have everything and yet I'm not as happy as I thought I would/should be?

"Do what makes you happy, that's the key!" is a common catch phrase thrown at 20-somethings. "Make, create,dance,sing,jump!"

I just think that this whole 'Do what makes you happy, follow your dreams' stuff is just some unrealistic bullshit that people are fed to keep them motivated and accepting the bleak realizations that life rarely hands you what you want. It's hard to find the strength to be optimistic. It's sad." She wrote.

"Well, then what the FUCK do we need?!" I responded, practically tearing my hair out. Isn't it enough to have the cute bachelor apartment,the creative job, the awesome friends, the parties, the clothes, the music? If it's not enough why do I have all this stuff?
I'm quite aware that one post ago I commented on how fortunate I am to have all these things. I am fortunate, and Lauren of last summer would high five Lauren of the present.However, despite the fact that I should pat my back on a 'job well done' for obtaining all that I ever wanted, I'm starting to think that getting what one wants doesn't necessarily equate to getting what one needs.

What I want is a cigarette and a whiskey sour. At least then my mild addictions would be satisfied.


So what is the key to real happiness? To no longer feeling antsy?

To the pursuit of happiness,Cheers.