.I watched the sunrise.

I'm covered in bruises and my feet are dirty and I smell like campfire.

I feel wonderful despite the raging hangover I have.


I said everything I've wanted to say for about four years. I didn't get closure but I did get massive clarification, an admittance of guilt , an apology and one of the best all night conversations I've had in ages.

When you're hanging out with a Wizard there's bound to be magic.

.Bye.

I can't believe I
Fell for that line.
I should have seen it coming this time.

But you tugged at my heart
and I covered my eyes
and loved you without sight.

That's when you ran.
That's when you walked away Baby
And all of that time, I was just blind
But it's alright.
and that's okay.
I'll be just fine.

The band is all here
and the bourbon is free
we drink & we dance without misery.
and my friends are so patient
while im stroking your ego
tomorrow they'll tell me so.

Oh let him go.
Let him run away Baby
How couldn't you see, that you're not meant to be
and it's alright
yeah it ok
just start living your life.

That's when I ran
that's when I walked away Baby
And all of this time, I was so blind.
But that's alright.
and that's okay.
I'll be just fine.

.You're at a barbeque and I'm losing my mind.

I think I need to go back into hiding.


So far reality and feeling things again and being social,
is just not working for me.


I wish I had the ability to just chill when it comes to him,
but something always rears its ugly head.


Eww.
What a sad, disgusting analogy.

Rears its ugly head. Uck.
FML.

.All things trendy.

Things I'm digging right now.



Yellow Nail Polish.



Grey Nail polish.




This little guy.



This reminds me of Beauty & the Beast for some reason.



Sigh..Drool.


And this...I want SO badly. It looks like an old ring I had that I wore for almost 4 years straight before it just vanished one day from my bathroom.



Because it's just too cute to resist.

.A dream is a wish your heart makes.

I am SO sick of my wardrobe.
Everything I have I hate. I remember loving every clothing item I have last summer, however this June 1st everything clothing wise I own is sucktacular.

Amber Brant and I went shopping today and I helped her find some amazing pieces. Everything looked so friggen good on her, then I tried on some things and they were all just horrible, and it wasn't those, "I look like crap" days either, I just felt like while everything fit perfectly something about the colours or the style in general was so...off..Its as if I've outgrown my old style but now I have no idea what to pick out for myself.

Money is also hindered greatly so unless someone wants to donate one sweet wardrobe to the Lauren Schell clothing fund then I'll just have to drool over these beautys.









/>


I've also been considering hair extensions. I really think my new wardrobe needs long flowing brown/black locks.

.Don't read this...I'm on repeat, I know.

I miss Elliott.













This sucks.

.It's never enough or it's always too much.

It's never enough.
Or it's always too much.
Oh hell , it's ever 'tuff.
This loving stuff.

He couldn't come home,
or pick up a phone
or be bothered to sleep in the same bed as me some nights.
He was rude and said no mushy things,
and got mad when I pouted when we couldn't be alone.
He was never enough.
He was never enough.

Then there's another one ,
who's just plain dumb,
he calls me four times a day and doesn't understand
"I have to go".
He says one too many mushy things,
and gets pouty and sullen when I want to be alone.
He was just too much.
He was just too much.