.Shake it like you mean it.

Holy poo...

Blogging has been the last thing on my mind lately.

After going to Shaun's trailer for the weekend,I worked on some material for the snippets I've been writing.
I've decided to at least attempt to write a book, or a novel...or novella, whichever you prefer. It seems to me that instead of talk talk talking about everything that goes on in my life I should keep a journal and compile it, do social experiments and maybe come up with something brilliant...or shitty, but whatever it turns out to be it has definitely helped me feel less annoying and isolating in my day to day life.
<3

Last week I went camping for an entire week in Teeswater.
I can't even begin to explain all the mayhem that ensued.

-Grant and Shaun flipped an ATV on to themselves.
-We shot-gunned beers all night, and all morning, and I stayed up for a total of 36 hours, before passing out.
-Skinny dipping
-Playing in the rapids
-Playing in the water fall.
-Smores
-Camp fire sidekicks
-Grant & Shaun being crazy
-Craazyness in general.


and...other amazing moments that I'll save for the book. bahaha.
oh life.
<3



I still have snippets of hurtful moments- one's where I see him, or hear about him, it's like taking a bullet. However, the more I'm away from him the more I can see how I deserve so much more. Love is funny.. a person can break you down, bring out the worst in you and make you cry without guilt and yet, you continue to love them.
I've been able to have days go by without even thinking of him, and that makes me so happy, because I shouldn't waste thoughts on him, but every once and a while..there he is, fucking up my moments and reminding me of the awful things that I let him do to me, I don't want him back but I do get upset, thinking "How could I let you treat me so mean?" "Why do I see you and feel like someone just punched me in the gut?"
"WHY AM I STILL CRYING OVER YOU?"

Shaun has helped make that go away.. a lot actually, but is that enough?
Oh boy.
Grimsby is such a safe haven