.We seek the nightmare.

Ok, is this or is this not, a hilarious concept:

To go out on an amazing date, and then to preserve the greatness of it- declare- "I'll never see him again, there's no way he can top that"

Smile, shake a hand and say "I've never gone on a date before, and that one was pretty fantastic. Thank you. Have a good life,.."

I mean, that's funny, no?


Hahaha. I think it's a truly hilarious concept, to actually say that to someone would shock them, I think, or , maybe, make them think you're nuts.

It's a concept! Not a reality.
In all reality you'd want to top that awesome date, wouldn't you? As humans we're constantly trying to improve, so naturally, as human nature would state; we'd want another chance to recreate awesomeness- and improve apoun it.
I just thought it would be funny to go against human nature for once.
I guess shaking hands is a start.


Lame.

Oh well, off to work, then p-a-r-t-y this weekend.
That's right, sweet ass home warming party. To celebrate the house that knows no drama.
I'm pretty excited to learn how to bbq. Hopefully nothing gets burnt, or set on fire....or you know, whatever else that could be worse than burnt or firey.
Dead.
I hope nothing gets dead.
Hah.
(I'm knocking on wood, I swear, I swear)

Did I mention how friggen loopey I feel this morning? Like, right out of my tree. If I drank more last night I would swear that I was still drunk.
Dancey.
That's how I feel right now, like I could dance all day.
Good thing I work with music. When poker face comes on today you bet I'll be dancing to it.
Oh! and I think I work with Jackson today too, he's always sweet for a good ol' eisle dance or two.
Ramble ramble
shit twit
the bus has come
and you've missed it.

Fuck, I'll have to take a cab now.

.Run run run away.

Oh man, runaway- yeah yeah yeahs.

Fuckin' check it out man. It's making my life.

So tragic, and sexual and beautiful. I keep listening to it on repeat.

In other news. Life

Ma bella vie.

I went on the BEST date of all dates tonight.

Was he cute?

Check.

Was he interesting?

Check.

Was he hilarious?

Check.

Did he have his shit together?

Check.

Did he make me utterly and completly happy tonight?

Check mate.

I love old school dates. Nothing, and I mean nothing beats Sushi, beer and a solid conversation.

Seriously.

"I didn't get you flowers, but I got you a blue gatorade, hope that's cool"

I gave up all hope that men could be interesting, and regardless of the fact that I might, in all actuallity, never see him again, he restored my faith in decent dudes.

I utterly dig decent dudes.

Utterly.

The only thing I regret is not kissing him.

I shook his hand instead.

Ahh.....I'm a dork.

Who shakes someone's hand?

"Can I ..you know, kiss you?"

"Uh...haha. here, shake my hand instead"

"Uh..sure"

Hahahahahahahahahahahahaha.

Oh. aaaahhahahahahahaha.

He was cute.

I also really enjoy having a good night in the company of a male, it's been so long. I'm pretty sure the last time I hung out with a guy I enjoyed he made my insides feel like they were coal. Black and good for grilling with.

Ma bella vie.

C'est bon, no?

.Music is my boyfriend.

Music is the only lover I have any more.

"Music is my hot hot sex."

True to any Lover of Lauren form, it's been frustrating me like nobodies business.
I have all these Cd's but my disc drive doesn't work on my computer, and somewhere in the 10097457345x's that I've moved I lost my disc man...
...So basically, I can listen to my cd's on my dvd player, but I can't bring them anywhere with me, and my ipod is old as fuck. Also, I've lost so many cd's from the old days that I just cannot survive without. Some things I have on my ipod but I'd really just rather have them in CD form, so I clean out my itunes, and somehow , start all over.

GRARGH!

Haha.
Normally my play list is pretty set on a couple of songs and a few artists, but lately it's been all over the place. At work I started writing a list for all the Cd's I have to buy, some of them I've heard (thank you seeqpod & myspace<3) and some of them I just want based on sheer gut feeling.

Need:
Metric-fantasies <3
Metric-Old world underground<3
Metric-Live it out
Kate Nash-Made of Bricks<3
Murder by death-In boca Al lupo ??
Taking Back Sunday-Tell all your friends <3
" " -Where you want to be <3 <3
" " -Louder now <3
" "- New Again ?? (out June 2nd!!)
Brand New -Deja Entendu <3 <3 <3 x's111109743597435734-78-67436
" " -The Devil & God are raging inside me <3
" "- Your favourite weapon<3
Finch-What it is to burn<3
Nofx-Coaster ??
Afi-Sing the sorrow <3
Regina Spektor-Soviet Kitsch
" "-Begin to hope <3!
" "- Far ?? (not out yet!)


I think that might be enough to get me through the week.
Haha.!
<3 I love my lover.

.You're showing me a side of you that I don't know.

I think I spent the last 7 months of my life dating pure evil.
I mean, there's no other way to explain how someone can drop the "L" bomb and then turn around and use words that don't convey that at all.
" Boring. Weak .Sniveling. Pathetic."

I think that, mixed with a dash for a need to constantly partake in sadistic conversations about why I suck plus an utter lack of compassion for another persons pain results in pure, unadulterated, evil.

"I never cared, I just faked it because I was bored"

"I'm starting to doubt whether or not you have a soul"
"I do, it's kept under my bed"


Well, no more whining. Block,delete, block, delete.

Peace out you evil f*ck.

Here's to will power to the max-treme.

.Let's do the time warp again.

I've been thinking about needing a bicycle for a long while now. I was walking along George St today on the way to grocery store and decided to stop in one of the used movie stores, in attempts to feed my sex&the city addiction...Well they didn't have any of that but they did have the sweetest little bicycle sitting in the middle of the store.

FOR SALE.

$35.oo


The weirdest part was that I had exactly $35.oo in my wallet.

I think it was meant to be.

It's very old, and blue. It looks like it's straight out of 1950.
I love every rusty inch of it.

.learning to love myself assignment.

There's this website called "Learning to love yourself" and it has assignments to I suppose, aide in the loving of one's self.
One that really caught me was the "Letters to yourself at a troubled time" . My sister did it for an assignment and so I thought I'd try it out.

To Lauren at 14:

-Grade nine will be memorable for you. Despite the rides in the back of cop cars and the fights with your mom, you won't regret anything.
-John Kelly will never love you back. Give it up. You'll be so much better off when you just accept that he's not that into you. Laughing at all of his girlfriends is way more satisfying.

At 15.
-Shaun Bockmaster isn't the love of your life. Thank him for the Thursday t-shirt and move on, otherwise at 2o you'll be wondering why he's marrying some other girl.
-Everything you're doing now is wrong, but you'll become stronger for it.
-Don't start smoking
-Working at Tim Hortons will change your life, for the better...no, seriously.
-Don't sleep around.
-Don't sleep with Barry. You'll never live that one down. Despite how hot the whole "Marilyn Manson " thing is now, it won't be in about..oh...4 months.
-Write everything down.
-Sit on the roof top more often, you'll miss this.
-despite everything, tell your mother you love her.
-take pictures of all of your animals. say good-bye to scooter and Katie, you'll never see them again.

16:
-Just kiss Dave.
-You're not fat.
-You'll look back on this year as the happiest ever.
-Your hair is friggen gorgeous.
-Shaun is still not the love of your life. ..and good for you for sticking up for yourself at least a little.
-When you're leaving , pack earlier, that way you won't move out with nothing.

17:
-You're upset because you've just realised all of the crap going on around you, you've just become aware. You're strong and you will get through this.
-Money is fleeting...but you should save more.
-Improv is a good choice.
-Dave Sider is a bad choice, avoid that all together, because in a month you'll get dumped over email and humiliated at your improv show by him and his emo friends.
-Shaun will dump you in exactly a month for the girl he's cheating on you with. Be his friend. but when he says " I want to be with you again" there will be a little voice screaming "No way Jose!" ..listen to it, or else you won't even be able to trust him and you'll be miserable all summer.
-DONT DATE ADAM COCKS.
-If you must date him just know how stupid he is and how all of your future relationships will be great because of this one idiot you lowered the bar for.
-Put more focus into Improv
-Student council... well don't cry about it, who cares if they don't like you. You're a bitch sometimes, embrace it.
-Emily and Breanne and Cassy and Jazz , these people matter.
-Tell Jason about your HUGE crush on him. 4 years from now it'll still be there.

18:
-Get a summer job.
-Hug Cindy more.
-Joe Deluca is what a boyfriend should act like.
-On the same note, end things with him now, because in a year from now, it won't be so easy.
-Peterborough is going to be good for this year, ...and a summer, and that's it.
-Don't sweat school so much.
-Embrace the fact that you actually like writing essays.


19:
-Go to the bars more
-Fight with Joe less. End things with Joe when the fighting starts...not during.
-Hang out with Cassy more
-School...well I'm not going to tell you not to flunk out, because ,really...you are where you are now because you fucked up.
-There are about 3 guys you really just should have never spoken to.
-SAVE SOME DAMN MONEY
-Move out of Wolsely, it'll save you SO much grief.
-Paint more.
-Don't feel so bad about school, when you were trying you were getting 80's.

20:
-DONT DATE ANYONE
-HMV is the best job you'll ever have.
-This is going to be a shit year but it'll get you to where you need to be.
-Jon is going to mess everything up, just avoid him. Please.
-Don't quit full time.
-Fleming is a waste of time.
-Move to Toronto when you first start thinking about it.
-The first time you think about leaving should be the time you leave, for good.
-Don't think for a second that you deserve less. Cheating is never acceptable. Ever. You deserve more, always.
-Don't compromise yourself for anyone, ever. If they tell you to be more "compassionate" or less "self-involved" flip them the bird and tell them you are who you are, deal or don't.
-Don't move in with Elliott.
-Wait until at least January before agreeing to date Elliott...
-He will break your heart. You will still love and miss him. Be prepared.
-Celebrate your birthday without him.

.My blogger society, A msn conversation with my sister.

.Lauren. :
I love blogs
I've decided they're healthier

Because i can whine whine whine all i want
and sendd my friends a link
and then they'll know whats up with me
and if they don't want to hear about it they just skip onto another blog.
Or comment if they'd like.
and then all the bad things can be brought up like "hey, i read on your blog your cat got run over"
and i'd be like "yeah, it was sad"
and then you'd say " i commented on it"
and id say, "I know, thanks for the support"
and that would be IT
Rudolf Rassendyll :
Hahahahaha
Blogger.
Blogging Society.
.Lauren:
"Elliott broke my heart"
"I know i read about it"
"Yeah, it sucked"
"I know, i commented that i was sorry"
"thanks for the support man"
hahahaha

OH MAN


I'm so blogging this.


Rudolf Rassendyll : Haha. A conversation with yourself. Nice.